In the past, when women didn’t normally work, men were expected to give them gifts to win their love. Even when women started working and became as successful as men, the norm remained the same; give them flowers and jewelry, and your love is sealed.
As time passed, though, the norm in dating and relationships changed. Women became more empowered, and many of them slammed the tradition of men using gifts to woo them. As a result, women and men alike began to criticize girlfriends and wives who still expect gifts, especially expensive ones, calling them materialistic or even greedy. They expressed that giving gifts should be done mutually, or that women should stop often expecting gifts because true love isn’t measured by material things.
But are they right, or are they misjudging?
When Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages became popular, we learned that there is such a love language called Receiving Gifts. Apparently, speaking this love language means you express love through tangible items. Does this explain why some people expect gifts from their partners and feel upset when they don’t get them?
Understanding “Receiving Gifts” As a Love Language
Of all the love languages, receiving gifts is often the most misunderstood. Many people feel more inclined to respect those with quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, or physical touch as a love language. Gifts, and material things in general, have gotten such a bad reputation in society because we associate them with superficiality. We think that gifts don’t express anything heartfelt at all, because the joy we receive from them is often short-lived.
True, we’re not going to be happy for a long time after receiving our coveted shoes or designer bag. But what we get wrong is, people whose love language is gifts aren’t asking for luxurious things. You can give them a flower you plucked from a park, and their hearts will melt.
Simply put, the cliche saying It’s the thought that counts is their mantra. No matter what you give them, be it a piece of candy or a car, it needs to convey a single message: I thought of you when I saw this.
There are also people whose language is giving gifts instead of receiving them. In this case, you express your love by giving your partner gifts without asking for anything in return. Modern society may misjudge these acts as spoiling your partner rotten, or assume that your partner chose you simply because of the gifts you’re giving them. Sadly, it’s impossible to please everybody, so explaining your real intent isn’t really necessary. But still, the world needs to know the truth about gifts as a love language.
Mark Williams, licensed mental health counselor and relationship coach, explains that the true meaning of gift-giving isn’t an extravagance, but sentimentality. While there are truly materialistic and greedy people out there, if giving or receiving gifts is your love language, you cherish every item you give to or receive from your partner, however small that may be. For you, every gift is a symbol that your partner always thinks about you, or that you’re always thinking about your partner.
Inexpensive Gift Ideas for a Partner Who Likes Gifts
Now that we’ve understood the truth about gifts as a love language, you’re probably eager to show your partner even more love. As pointed out above, you can give them absolutely anything. But if there’s a special occasion coming, like your anniversary or his or her birthday, one of these gifts or two will make them incredibly touched:
1. A Subscription Box
Some subscription boxes offer services for up to six months, like History by Mail. This particular box sends replicas of historical documents, including Albert Einstein’s correspondence with Franklin D. Roosevelt. If your partner is a history junkie, you’ll make them giddy with excitement for six months straight!
2. A Self-care Product
If your partner takes his or her self-care rituals seriously, they can always add one more product to their stash. Observe what they want to care for the most; is it their skin, hair, or nails? If it’s their skin, a facial massager may give them joy. For hair, any styling tool will surely be appreciated. And for their nails, a shade from a nail polish brand they’ve always wanted should be your pick.
3. An Inexpensive Piece of Jewelry
You don’t have to go for a diamond or a 24k gold, especially if you’re only giving them a promise ring. There are high-quality silicone rings under $50, and they’re more comfortable and stylish.
4. Anything That Will Make Their Life Easier
People with gifts as a love language are practical, too. They don’t require anything “cute” to feel appreciated. Observe their daily routines and see how you can increase their convenience. Maybe a pot-holder, a book stand, or extra pillows will do the trick. Remember, they may like gifts, but they see thoughtfulness more. Your partner isn’t materialistic; they just put a sentimental value on every gift they receive from you.
